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<title>php -- the tale of a nonexistent language</title>
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<div class="title">
<h1 id="php">PHP</h1>
<h2 id="a-real-language-or-just-an-illusion">a real language or just an illusion?</h2>
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<p>Most of you probably have heard about php already, or so you think. My theory is, that php is in fact NOT real!!</p>
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<h2 id="why-it-isnt-real">Why it isnt real:</h2>
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<p>here I will go over on why php isnt real</p>
<p>please note that those reasons arent subjective opinions, but facts.</p>
<ol>
<li>Have you ever seen php code? I certanly haven't</li>
<li>I have also never met a real PHP programmer, now you might say you're one, well then... you just arent real either :)</li>
<li>Every website I've been on doesn't use php! It either uses html, css or javascript but not php!</li>
<li>We also cannot verify that files that have the .php extension actually are php code, as the source is not visible(see point 1)</li>
<li>PHP would cause a lot of security vulnerabilities, no one would create a language with that many vulnerabilities</li>
</ol>
<div class="title">
<h2 id="why-people-might-say-php-is-real">Why people might say php actually is real:</h2>
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<p>Some people might say php is actually real</p>
<p>which is completely fine, we all have those moments in our life</p>
<ul>
<li>I code in php!</li>
<li>my answer: You arent real either then.</li>
</ul>
</li>
</ul>
<p>Why only one argument that it is real?</p>
<p>Because there are no other arguments, further proving php isnt real</p>
<div class="title">
<h2 id="but-what-about-the-software-made-for-it">But what about the software made for it?</h2>
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<p>The Software is made to make people believe php is real, as people could go insane when they find out php is not real</p>
<p>So all the governments around the world hired some companies to make software for php, like phpstorm, to make people believe it is real and prevent people from going insane</p>
<div class="title">
<h2 id="php.net">php.net</h2>
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<p>the existence of php is a good lie, hence people who know about it made a website for it so people think it is real</p>
<p>also, the php website has random pictures of elephant plushies at the bottom, this only screams "hey, we aren't real"</p>
<div class="title">
<h2 id="axtlos-is-always-wrong">axtlos is always wrong</h2>
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<p>no im not! I'm wrong <em>most</em> of the time, which isnt this time!</p>
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<h2 id="photos-of-php-code-from-2010">You can dig up old photos of php code form like 2010</h2>
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<p>We're talking about 2010, I think everyone knows what a year 2010 was.</p>
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<h2 id="The-source-code-is-on-github">The php source is on github!</h2>
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<p>It infact, is not! The "php interpreter" is there, but not php itself, and everyone can make an interpreter for anything, this doesnt mean it needs to exist!</p>
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<h2 id="code example">Code exmple</h2>
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<p>So apparently this is how php code looks:</p>
<p><code><?php echo"Hello World, I'm not real";?></code> </p>
<p>Doesn't this look similiar?</p>
<p>It should, because its just html!</p>
<p>Since php doesnt even seem to have its own syntax, its not real</p>
<div class="title">
<h2 id="conclusion">Conclusion</h2>
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<p>PHP just isnt real</p>
<p>You are lying if you say you code in php</p>
<p>If you say its real then you are smooth brain!</p>
<div class="title">
<h3 id="conclusion">Update (idk the date, 2022)</h3>
<p>After seeing the php "mascot"(something not real can't have a mascot)(which is really cute btw) I have concluded that php is partially real, meaning that the first p is real, the rest is still a lie!</p>
</div>
<p>Goodbye and thanks for reading :)</p>
<p>This is a joke btw, you can use php if you like it</p>
<p>Thanks to <a href="https://github.com/ibzann" style="color:#55CDFC;">ibzan</a> for giving me reasons on why php is real and helping me expand this</p>
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